I've been taking stock of myself.  All aspects.  It's mind boggling.

It's not an easy thing to evaluate oneself realistically.  The view is, shall I say, skewed - wanting to see the positives.  I do, however, need to see the negatives as well.  I can't improve what I can't see to analyze.

Introspection can be depressing so I try to balance identifying what I need to improve with recognizing my strengths.  We all have strengths, even though not as numerous as we'd like to believe!

At this stage of my life, I'm not certain I can add many strengths but am hoping to at least downsize or eliminate weaknesses.  It was just in my present decade when I added exercise and I eliminated smoking in a previous decade, so I know making changes is possible.

I can begin by examining what I do.  It's a good thing to know what it is we like to do, what it is we do well and what we do not do well.  Life is less complicated when we face truths.

I like the business world, for instance, and am no longer domestic.  I remember cleaning vigorously when my children were young, and making 7,534 meals before resigning that task for good.

The best way to find
our own flaws is to hear what consistent
complaints we have about others.

It is far easier for me to recognize that I no longer cook and clean, especially since I did it when it was appropriate to my life situation, than to identify character flaws.  Who among us really wants to see those?  We can go over preferences without discovering core truths and we cannot improve until we are open to discovering how we need to grow personally.

How do I treat other people?  That is a central question.  Am I pleasant to be around?  These are questions I need to answer.  Where do I find the answers?  And what makes me ask the questions?  Ahhhh.

The best way to find our own flaws is to hear what consistent complaints we have about others.  Do we generally find others rude?  Incompetent?  Lazy?  Selfish?  There will be our clues.  I'm going to listen to what I say and examine if it is really about me.

It's easy for us to see what someone else could improve.  I'll simply use the ability to see those specs in your eye to find the beams in mine.

Imagine what could happen if we all looked in the mirror.  Ok.  I'll go first.

Jean Loxley-Barnard has been a writer all her life and studied both sociology and psychology at George Washington University where she earned a B.A. Her company, The Shopper, Inc., encompasses all the Loxley-Barnard family publications - The Shopper Magazines and Doctor to Doctor Magazine. She has been in the advertising, consulting and publishing business for 39 years.