by Jean Loxley-Barnard
When someone is in love, his/her face shows it. And age doesn't matter. In fact, those in love always look younger. If we could capture those powerful chemicals that swirl through lovers, we might indeed retain the fountain of youth.
Pay attention, and anyone can see the signs. It can certainly be called happiness, but it is more than that. If we can remember when we were last in love we might be able to conjure up the feeling. It isn't exactly the feeling that continues, even in a good marriage or on-going committed relationship. Maybe it can't be.
Sustaining the exhilaration of those first months of being in love may be impossible. We can easily see in new couples that the world holds little else for them except each other. They can hardly breathe, let alone work!
By no means do I mean that love can't last, doesn't last. I mean that the first blush of newly discovered love can't sustain the other-worldly feeling so obvious to all observing them.
For the first time in their lives, lovers find a 'perfect person.' And they say that over and over in every possible description of each other to anyone within hearing distance. It brings a smile to all around them.
If the state of being in love translates to a loving relationship, joy can continue, but is not an every moment awareness. If the state of being in love goes away, some will continue to seek that feeling again and again, believing real love must have that in love glow. But those in a forever search for real love, thinking it is that initial in-the-cloud state, may never know the happiness of growing old together.
Let's remember the early
Happily for those of us with on-going good relationships, we remember when we were first in love and are grateful for the lovely memory. And now we are grateful that we can continue to breathe and go forward in a lasting and loving relationship.
I have a dear friend who is in love right now and I am thrilled for her happiness. She deserves it. Her joy is so palpable I can tell myself it will last forever.
The holiday of Valentine's that is upon us wants everyone to be in love. Why not! Let's remember the early days of our love affairs and relive the feeling. Let's celebrate a lasting relationship and commemorate the best of friendships. In fact, let's tell all those we love unabashedly that we love them. There are all kinds of love and the world needs as much love as we can share.
Jean Loxley-Barnard has been a writer all her life and studied both sociology and psychology at George Washington University where she earned a B.A. Her company, The Shopper, Inc., encompasses all the Loxley-Barnard family publications - The Shopper Magazines and Doctor to Doctor Magazine. She has been in the advertising, consulting and publishing business for 38 years.