Swaddling their newborn babies in their arms, parents dream about how they will grow up and what kind of personality they will develop. Seldom do parents realize how many identities their little ones will have during their first five years. First of all, they are a child going through various developmental stages: beginning to roll over, crawling, and taking those first steps. Then their whole world opens up.

They are a member of a family with parents who, in the beginning, they learn to trust for everything before slowly expanding their horizons to others who impact their lives. In some families, they have the identity of being a sibling who interacts daily with brothers and sisters who are closer to their age than their parents. All of those family experiences are critical to the healthy development of children.

The insular protection of a family does not last long. Soon there is childcare, followed by preschool and kindergarten. Children take on the identity of a student. There are many other people who begin to impact their development. The hours spent in an educational setting are critical to the lifelong personality of that child. The student is not only influenced by the teachers and other adults seeking to expand their knowledge but also by other children and youth in the school setting. Throughout my career as a teacher and principal, I kept a poster in my office that read: "A classroom is four walls filled with the future." Working with high school seniors serving as interns in an elementary school, I cautioned them about the language they used in the classroom. They could not use some of the words they shared with their friends outside of school. Young children are impacted by everyone around them.

Parents often encourage their young children to participate in sports. This gives them an opportunity to experience a team identity. They learn skills but more importantly, they learn to work with others for common goals. I remember when I was coaching a tiny-tot soccer team, one father got so upset with his six-year-old child for picking flowers while serving as the goalie during one of the games. It is important for parents to see these activities from their children's perspective as they are growing up. The child will develop an activity identity no matter what the activity might be-dance lessons, scouting, piano, band, chorus, church youth group, etc.

Young children are not planning their future. They are living their present. Parents are sometimes so wrapped up in the multiple parts of their own lives that they forget the importance of each day in their children's lives. Each day plays a part in what their children will become as adults. Each day is special. Each day is a gift. Don't waste that critical time in their lives.