Tuesday, June 22nd, 2021

P Shopper Columns


It is easy to recognize the importance of expressing love to the central people in our lives when there is a day set aside for everyone to do just that. But it is just as important to find the love that we have put aside and allow ourselves to feel it - and maybe even have the courage to express it.

If we sit still for a moment and think of people we've loved throughout our lives, it can be very warming.

Some memories of our loving relationships will make us smile or laugh, others will bring up heartache and tears, but all will remind us of how rich life is when we love.

Sometimes love takes the wrong road and gets lost, but it is not gone. Sometimes love gets put away for another day, but that day never comes. Sometimes love gets mistaken for pain and changes its expression, but it is still love.

I love the question, What would you do if you knew you couldn't fail? Here's a similar one, Who would you tell you love if you knew it would be well received?

Whom do we love anyway? How about our ex-husbands and wives? We once loved them (I'm not one of those who believe the oft-used I never loved him anyway-) and probably still do, even if the love has changed form.

How about old flames or best friends from long ago? And remember that teacher you cursed for forcing you to learn? How do you see her now and have you ever told her?

Are we estranged from someone in our family? I have a family member who became estranged from me and it is the most painful part of my life, knowing I can't change it and not knowing what caused it.

My Dad's large family split apart after their mother died and I think it was over the few belongings she left, or rather the feelings that surfaced around those few belongings.

When he matured, Dad spent years trying to put his Humpty Dumpty family together again, but to little avail. He was able to reconnect with his oldest sister, but that caused two other sisters to reject him.

Can you imagine? Then, as a younger brother was dying, he was unable to convince him to let bygones be bygones. Dad's heart was broken for the rest of his life. I know how he felt.

Love doesn't care who is right and who is wrong,
or even if there is such a thing.

If your family is apart, why not send a card that simply expresses your love?

Do we work with people who have been there for us? Have we said that to them?

Every day offers us an opportunity to cement our relationships with love. Whatever you'd like from someone, give it to them or someone else. We are all alike in wanting to be loved and appreciated. Why wait for the other person to go first? It's our turn.

Jean Loxley-Barnard has been a writer all her life and studied both sociology and psychology at George Washington University where she earned a B.A. Her company, The Shopper, Inc., encompasses all the Loxley-Barnard family publications - The Shopper Magazines and Doctor to Doctor Magazine. She has been in the advertising, consulting and publishing business for 39 years.